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how can i pretend that i dont know whats going on

i got a nice day that day.. i thought.. but in the edge of the day i got a shit paper than change everything that moment. hasil psikotest saran penjurusan. that moment i forgot to think "saran" words.. cause the situation suddenly went out crazy. i got the words that i dont want. my head start to blowned up. i cant think again. my tears went out by them self..... that's the most sad moment i've felt i guess. gue gak mungkin dapet dan masuk jurusan itu. gue tau. gue gak berfikir itu masih saran dan masih ada kesempatan rapot... gue gabisa mikir saat itu. rasanya gue mau obrak abrik semua yang ada diepaan gue.apalagi guru bk sekolah yang kata2nya astaghfirullah nyakitin:" i wont see him again. this is actually just gonna be fine. but i dont know:(... but now i know God have an amazing plan for me... i should STUDY HARDDDDDDD TO THE DEATH now i know that... i'll just enjoy this.. and guess what.. this morning i got some breaking damn news again... tapi sudahlah meskipun gue anggap ini rushed week for me. this is the beginning of everything amazing in my life:). ya Allah you still there with me isnt?:"....